casora_tigerkin

Christmas Fic

2008-12-01T05:18:49Z

Title: Mistletoe Misadventures
Rating: T (for safety)
Characters/Pairings: Jazz, Prowl, Ratchet, Bumblebee, Sari, Fanzone, Bulkhead, JxP
Summary: Not taking the time to understand local traditions is a very good way to get your aft handed to you.
Warnings: Slightly shashy, mild violence.
Disclaimer: Transformers (c) Hasbro

Jazz stood in the door to the main room of the warehouse taking in the sights. Bumblebee was chasing Prowl around with a clump of greenery tied to a stick, while Bulkhead helped Sari and Captain Fanzone decorated the base. Or rather Bulkhead was doing the decorating while the humans watched Bee and Prowl while laughing themselves sick. As Prowl hadn't noticed him yet Jazz walked over to the humans intent on being let in on the joke. "What's going on? Normally Prowl doesn't stick around when Bee pulls this sort of stunt." Fanzone took a second to catch his breath before answering, "Optimus decided that Prowl needed to be more social and ordered him to stay in the same room with the rest of the team for three hours a day, it's only been an hour and a half so far." At this point Prowl finally noticed Jazz and shot him a pleading look. Jazz chuckled before opening their private com line :Sorry Prowl, Fanzone told me about Optimus's orders: Prowl shot Jazz a murderous look before replying, :Traitor: Jazz just shrugged before turning back to Fanzone. "Okay, I know watching Bee chase Prowl is funny but not this funny. So, what's the joke?" Fanzone shook his head before pulling himself together, "Bee took Sari shopping for decorations and on the way home he saw some boys chasing a pair of girls with a sprig of mistletoe, he then apparently decided to try it on Prowl." A snicker escaped Jazz's vocalizer earning him another glare from Prowl. "I guess he figured it would annoy him pretty good, right?" Fanzone shook his head with a grin before replying, "Actually, I kinda figure he's finally admitting his feelings." Sari chimed in, "Don't you think they make a cute couple." Jazz's thought processes came to a screeching halt as he tried to take in the humans comments. As a result he was rendered mute till Fanzone took pity on Bumblebee and shouted, "Bee there are better ways to get Prowl to kiss you!" At this, all motion in the room stopped. The only sound was Jazz's shocked "What?!" All attention was turned on the humans as the bots looked for an answer. Sari and Fanzone exchanged a look before Sari spoke up, "It's a Christmas tradition when two people stand under the mistletoe together they are supposed to kiss, and given that that's mistletoe." At this Sari pointed to the clump of greenery attached to Bumblebee's stick. "I can only conclude that you want Prowl to kiss you." Bee looked the mistletoe before looking at Jazz. Motion then resumed with Bumblebee's mad dash out of the room with Jazz hot on his heels. A few seconds later the sounds of a scuffle reached the stunned ears of the remaining occupants of the room. The sounds ended with a muffled yelp. Jazz then stalked back into the room, picked up Prowl and stormed back out. Prowl's protests grew fainter till they where cut off by the sound of a door shutting. The room was silent until Sari spoke up, "Um... what just happened?" Her question was answered ten minutes later when a very upset Ratchet stormed into the room, "Would someone like to explain to me why in Primus's name did I just have to remove a clump of greenery from Bumblebee's tailpipe?!" Ratchet glared at the room's occupants till Fanzone explained what happened. At this Ratchet's jaw dropped, "I knew he was stupid but I didn't think he was that stupid." Sari looked at Ratchet with a confused expression on her face, "What do you mean?" she asked. Ratchet couldn't keep the smirk off his faceplates as he replied, "Bumblebee and Prowl aren't a couple, Jazz and Prowl are."

Challenge Response

2008-11-21T21:36:22Z

Title: Sleeping in the Rain
Rating: PG
Prompt: Sing to awaken a missing Autobot, for the November mini-challenge
Characters/Parings: Jazz, Prowl, mentions of Sentinel
A/N: I don't know if this counts for the challenge because Jazz technically isn't missing but he's cutting it close, but I see Sentinal as the type to send out the dogs if one of his men goes "missing" for five minutes on an "organic infested planet."
Warnings: Slight Jazz/Prowl
Timeline: Set shortly after the events in "The Elite Guard"
Disclaimer: Transformers (c) Hasbro

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When Jazz first woke up he couldn’t remember where he was, nor did he know why he was soaking wet. Looking around, it hit him. He was on the roof of Optimus’ team’s base near the opening to Prowl’s room. Jazz had to bite back a groan when he realized why, he’d shown up hoping to talk to Prowl alone but the other ninja had been out on patrol. He had decided to wait for him despite the threat of rain and had apparently fallen asleep in the process. Some ninja I am, if Sentinal ever finds out this I’ll never hear the end of it. I can’t believe it! Not only did I fall asleep but I slept through it starting to rain, no wonder I’m soaked . . . . .but if the rain didn’t wake me, then what did? As Jazz sat berating himself he heard a sound, it was so soft that at first he thought he was imagining it but when it continued he decided to investigate. Carefully peering through hole in Prowl’s roof he discovered the source of the sound. Jazz rebooted his sensors twice before accepting what he was seeing. A small radio was on with the volume turned as low as possible, Jazz could hear it but he couldn’t identify the song, accompanying the radio was Prowl. The dark ninja swayed gracefully to the music as he spun around the room, a peaceful expression gracing his features as he sang. Jazz couldn’t hear what Prowl was singing but what he could hear enchanted him, Prowl had a beautiful singing voice. It took all of Jazz’s self control not to jump down and join Prowl’s dance, Given that I’m soaking wet even Sentinel would be able to tell that I’d been here all night. If he didn’t kick me out himself he could get me thrown in the brig on stalking charges. Jazz started as his internal alarm sounded, before he quickly checked his chronometer. Jazz mentally cursed as he realized that he had approximately twenty earth minutes to get back to the ship before Sentinel noticed his absence. Jazz silently climbed down from the roof and hurriedly started back to the ship, transforming once he was out of earshot. As he raced back he tried to find a solution to his new problem. How in Primus’s name am I going to get Prowl to sing for me?

Optimus Really Needs to Copywrite His Name

2008-11-18T04:04:12Z

Found something interesting online. This would be a good name for a Femme Optimus.
<a href="http://www.amazon.com/gp/r.html?R=ZXRQCJICNFT3&C=17NLGKP2Y70D2&H=2qmkGb6IkQVpqvb11dBDHlDMvYsA&T=C&U=http://www.amazon.com/gp/subs/primeclub/signup/main.html/ref%3Dpe_32690_10397600_pe_g2/."> Amazon Prime </a>
(if not allow please let me know so i can remove)

Transformers Halloween Contest entry

2008-10-31T21:09:52Z

Go easy on me ii's my first fic.

Title: Archival Entry #52353 Seeing Things
Rating: PG
Charactars/Parings: Jazz, Ratchet, Prowl, Blaster and his cassettes; slight JxP
Warnings: Mild descriptions of torture, slight mention of slash
Based on this bunny. 59. Perceptor and Bluestreak are separated from the others during a battle and are trapped in a cave-in. The others are having trouble locating them until Perceptor shows up and leads them to where he left Bluestreak. When they dig him out... they also find Perceptor. Was Perceptor dead and his ghost saved Bluestreak or was it a crisis apparition? You decide.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Everyone knew that Optimus Prime’s second in command was odd even if they didn’t know why he was odd. When they found out why the almost inevitable response was, “He has a glitch?!” This was almost inevitably followed by the speaker being dragged off by whoever was nearest for a chat with Ratchet. Once most of the members of the ark had had this discussion they were content to ignore Jazz’s “quirk”, others needed a little more explaining, sometimes followed by threatening, before they were willing to leave Jazz alone. The extended version of the explanation usually proceeded as followed.

“It all started with a routine espionage mission to Shockwave’s lab. We had just received intelligence that Shockwave was performing experiments on captured prisoners to create the perfect solider. Megatron had tried this before but high command felt that this time Shockwave might actually succeed, thus it was necessary to send an operative in to investigate the claim. At this time Jazz wasn’t our SIC nor was he head of Ops, but he was the best agent at the time for this kind of job. To no one’s surprise Jazz was assigned to follow up on the rumor. We lost contact with him shortly after he made it into the compound, and it was six earth months before we found him. Apparently the Decpticons had started the rumor in hopes of striking a blow to the already stretched thin Special Ops by taking out one or more of their best agents. When we found him he was barely online and it took all of my medical expertise to repair him. It wasn’t until I brought him online that I realized that something was wrong. The first he asked after he came online was “How are Blaster an’ Prowl doing?” Now you know as well as I do that there are no Autobots by those names, but Jazz was insistent. He described them to me in detail when I asked him about them; Blaster’s was an orange mech with a design that was very similar to Soundwave’s, he also had four cassettes by the names of Eject, Rewind, Steeljaw, and Ramhorn. Prowl was a black and white of the same body type as Bluestreak and Smokescreen. Blaster was a communications specialist while Prowl was a tactician. Jazz claimed that they had also been prisoners of the Decpticons who had been rescued with him. A call to the rescue team confirmed that Jazz had been the only prisoner held at the compound and as far as they knew no prisoners had been sent elsewhere in the months following his capture. Armed with this information I preformed every test and scan I could think of, all of which came up either negative or normal. As far as my medical equipment was concerned there was nothing wrong with Jazz. I was inclined to agree and kick him out of the med bay until I caught him talking to someone who wasn’t there. When I approached his berth he smilingly introduced me to the “mech”, “This is Prowl, Ratchet” at my look of disbelief he glared at me till I felt obliged to shake hands with thin air. Following this exchange it became simpler to play along with Jazz then to fight with him over the existence of these two mechs. I would recommend you do the same as Jazz tends to get belligerent when questioned about their existence. Jazz hasn’t been replaced as SIC because his imaginary friends haven’t hindered his performance, in fact you might say they’re the ones responsible for his promotion. You see ever since “Blaster” and “Prowl” showed up Jazz has gotten a lot better at his job, his understanding of both the tactical and communication fields skyrocketed and he became a lot more responsible. “

“High command’s theory on this is rather simple, Shockwave. Remember why Jazz was sent to his lab in the first place? Old Shockwave probably need a test subject in better condition, you see what better way to improve your soldiers than to have some who have a great understanding of many fields. If this is the case then it almost worked, the problem is you have to go the roundabout way of getting information from him. If you want tactical info you have to get Jazz to “ask Prowl”, same with communications and “Blaster.” Unfortunately, this theory has several holes in it. Firstly Jazz does not have the capability of being in two places at once, a lot of the information Jazz gets comes from “Blaster’s cassettes”, and most of this intel is in real time. In other words Jazz may be at headquarters and be recreating the layout of a Con outpost he’s never been to via one of the “cassettes”. Secondly Jazz doesn’t have the processing capabilities necessary to come up with complex battle plans, nor does he have the modifications needed to hack Con communications frequencies or monitor several dozen of our communications lines at once. I also feel that my scanners would have picked up on that sort of experimentation or Jazz would have told us. In other words we don’t know why Jazz sees these mechs. Oh, one last thing don’t flirt with Jazz. He believes that Prowl is his lover.”

End of Original Entry entered by Head Archivist Datastream.

Addition to Entry #52353 as told by Autobot CMO Ratchet

“If you’re reading this then I will assume you know about Jazz’s quirk and will skip the details. It’s been eight million years since it appeared and I finally know what caused it if not how it happened. Six earth months ago we received a message from the femmes on Cybertron, while raiding Shockwave’s labs for energon they stumbled upon a cell containing two badly damaged mechs. After rescuing them Elita-1 decided that their best chance of survival was me, and arranged for them to be delivered to Earth. Once we got them to the repair bay it was a race against time to keep their sparks from extinguishing but we managed. It took them another month to online, and this is where things took a strange turn. The first to wake up was the black and white, doorwinged mech, when he came online the look in his optics was of one waking up from a nightmare and it took several breems to convince him that this was real and that he was not in Shockwave’s lab. Once he calmed down he gave his designation as Prowl, yes Prowl. As we looked at him in shock he told us that he was a neutral who was captured shortly before the war and had been Shockwave’s prisoner ever since. He then proceeded to identify the orange mech as Blaster and informed me that it would probably take longer for him to wake up because he had four cassettes to support. Apparently Blaster had been taken so Shockwave could study cassettes.”

“At this point Jazz walked into the bay to inquire about my patients. I’ve never seen a bot as shocked as Prowl was upon seeing Jazz before he crashed. When we rebooted him he told us that for the longest time he and Blaster had been having hallucinations of being Autobots, mostly centering on Jazz. They both believed that these hallucinations were the only thing that kept them sane over the course of their captivity.”

The only explanation I can think of for this phenomenon is what humans call “astral projection” or the separation of the soul, or spark in this case, form the body due to trauma or severe mental distress. I still have no explanation for why Jazz was the only one who could see them, or how they manage to maintain the separation of spark and body for so long, and will probably never have one.

End of Addition as told by Autobot CMO Ratchet.